We Beat Tennessee? WE BEAT TENNESSEE!!!!!!!!

We beat tennesee. We beat Tennessee? We beat Tennessee! WE beat tennessee. we BEAT tennessee. we beat TENNESSEE.

I don't know what to do. I'm not sure. I'm sitting here. Its kinda quiet in my living room. ESPN is rambling on and on about Tedy Bruschi and now they have switched to horse racing. Oh, now we turned to Nick at Nite and the Jeff Foxworthy Show is on.

The problem is that I don't really understand whats happening. I'm confused. I'm serious. I don't understand why the TV didn't explode with Fireworks. Why didn't we get raptured away to South Carolina? Why didn't Sonny turn into a person? Why is ESPN now talking about NASCAR? Why isn't Nick at Nite covering the postgame at Tennessee? I'm not being stupid. I'm just blown away.

We never beat them. No, never. I have been to games vs. Tenn. I have watched on TV. I saw in 2000 when we were winning with 30 seconds to go and couldn't stop them at the very end. I watched in 2003, when we were supposed to get beat by 40 and took them to overtime. Only to barely lose.

I have watched us play game after game when we couldn't kick a field goal to save our collective lives. And then there was tonight.

Down by 2 with 2 and half minutes to play. 4th down and a 50 yard field goal ahead of us. We can't kick. Never could. We can't hit easy field goals when the game is on the line. We never make kicks longer than 40 yards. Staring down a 50 yard field goal, being 2 points behind there were two things I knew.

1. We can't make a kick like this.

2. If by some chance we made it. We could never keep Tennessee from taking the ball downfield to win the game in the last minute.

If anyone is reading this and you think it sounds like a typical little guy wins sports story, thats fine, but stop that and listen.

Did you ever drop an egg on the ground, see it hit the ground. See it spill egg all over the floor? Pretend someone asked you, while you were staring at the egg already broken, if you could catch it before it gets there. What would you say? That is this. Those two things that I said. They are as true as saying Ice is cold, water is wet, ESPN is obnoxious, Sonny is a wild dog, or Star Wars will make money. You just don't understand how impossible this was.

Yet....we beat Tennessee. We made the field goal!! We made the field goal. He hit it. It was straight, it was long enough by about 6 inches. Then guess what. We stopped them. No really. They got one first down. We got the ball back. We got a first down. They called their time outs. And we stopped them.

We beat Tennessee!!! I simply don't know what to say. I'm dumbfounded. I really feel almost like if this happened, the world was supposed to become like Zathura. Like I was going to walk out the door and see the rings of Jupiter or something. I guess I'll just sit back and try to enjoy it. But the truth is. I feel like the world is a different place. Like we will all start saying "South Carolina can beat Tennessee, but the can't make a trash bag that won't tear open"

Oh well. In other news. The Dodgers were expected to name a new manager soon, but they fired their GM instead. Pretty wild and surprising news. But to be honest, I don't have anywhere near the energy to care.

Dan: Carolina beat Tennessee.
Casey: They beat Tennessee?
Dan: That's right, they beat Tennessee.
Casey: Dana!
Dana: They beat Tennessee Casey
Dan: See?
Casey: The Dodgers fired DePodesta
Dan: That's right.
Casey: But Tom doesn't want to talk about it?
Dan: Nope....And do you know why?
Casey: Because they beat Tennessee?
Dan: Because they Beat Tennessee!